I have been in a season of temptation lately that exactly illustrates how we can disconnect with His mercy and favor.  For the last two weeks, I have had a battle with hopelessness and discouragement.  It’s come and gone, but every few days I have battled the feeling that nothing I do matters.

Friday night I led a soaking meeting, which I host each month at my home church as long as travel doesn’t make it impossible.  As I stood at the keyboard, I played and sang, trusting God for a tune and for words.  Like a drowning man who seizes a bit of flotsam, I grasped an odd little melody that came to mind and built a song around it. And then there was another key and a new melody, and then another, and then back to the first as if the whole were a single well-ordered composition.

As I played, I felt I owed everyone an apology.  It all seemed trite to me, and I wondered if the people were sitting before me, feeling trapped by an etiquette that would not allow them to leave.  So I stopped the music and reached into a ministry time.  “Who would like prayer?”

The ministry time seemed blessed, and I invited people to help minister to one another with me.  They did well.

The meeting ended and Mike Burns, who had run sound, presented me with a recording of the first 80 minutes.  A couple of days later, I played the music to see if it was as dreadful as it had felt when I played.  By the time I had listened for a few minutes, I realized I didn’t need to apologize for it.  The thoughts of my heart had all been a lie.

 
I’m sharing this because, sooner or later, we all face this temptation.  And Isaiah 27:11 points out the key issue we must settle in our hearts:  do we understand that God is pouring His mercy and favor into us and through us as we do our best to serve and love His people?

If we don’t discern or understand, we will judge ourselves by the wrong standard and be tempted to give up.

If we don’t discern or understand that God is using us, we will believe a lie about ourselves and it will enslave us.  And then, by forfeiting our freedom, we will no longer be able to follow Jesus in the daily assignments He gives us.

We can allow many things to put us off.  Over the years, here are a few things that have tempted me to misjudge the mercy and favor of God:  the crowds were too small or unresponsive; someone else’s gifts outshone mine and I wasn’t needed; I was too young for God to use me; I was too old, and my day had passed.  At least I’m old enough now that I never feel too young for God to use me.